Inside my head

I write this sitting on a train speeding towards London after a lovely weekend back in Manchester with Ben!

It was Ben's birthday on Friday so I decided to give myself the weekend off and just enjoy being at home.  We hosted a barbecue yesterday afternoon/evening and a rather lovely time was had by all (I hope) although my attempt at having a break was not quite as successful!

It was nice not to be looking at my script for a couple of days but this play isn't something you can really have a day off from. The lines are constantly swirling round in my head!  I can't shut it off!  I kept trying to not think about it at the BBQ but people would be talking and I'd hear one word that would remind me of something in the play, or a sentence that one of the characters say or I'd find myself making a facial expression that I connect to a certain line.  Honestly it sometimes feels (and looks) like I'm going mad!  

What is good is that I am now in a place for all this to happen. For a word/sound/movement to connect me to something in the play means that I am getting to grips with the script. It goes deeper than my memory. It is getting "into me". That may sound like theatrical nonsense (which it kind of is!) but I don't really know a better way of describing it.  I'm not having to constantly try and think of the lines - I can just open my mouth as different characters and they know what to say. (Not all of them mind you - some still need to work a bit harder!)

So this is basically a very long winded way of saying I can't switch off but that its kind of good!

Now we have the blocking of the play (in all 3 different formats!!) and I am off book  we can start looking at scenes in more and more detail.  Basically we've wrapped the present in some plain wrapping paper but now it is time to start to add the glitter and bows!  Its the little extras that make the difference!

We have 5 days until our opening night (Eeeeergh!) so its going to be a pretty crazy week but we are on the right track.

Brain fog

So we are about to start day 5 of rehearsals and I thought I'd talk about the dreaded brain fog. 

I'm sure there is a scientific paper somewhere saying the human brain can only concentrate fully for about 40 mins before you starting to become less focussed. This is defintely true for me, infact I think I can probably only manage about 20 mins before I need a quick time out! 

Because it is just me in the rehearsal room I don't get any of the usual down time when other actors are rehearsing scenes (or have other people to share the answering of questions with) so we have had to find a way of working which allows my lapses of concentration.

Through out the day our brains naturally make us take a break when we need it, it may just be a brief chat about something vaguely script related or a longer off topic chat about the state of the world/what we had for dinner/the weather, anything really. Zoë is great at allowing this to happen and also bringing us back to the play (otherwise I could talk about my dinner all day!)

By having these mini breaks (as well as tea breaks and lunch break obviously) I am actually able to work a lot harder and longer than I would if we just pushed on through and I tried to force my brain to focus.

However we know that once we hit 5pm we are in dangerous territory.  This is when I start to feel the brain fog taking hold! 

It feels like your brain is full and no matter how hard you try you just can't seem to process any more information. You are trying to listen but actually you are just staring at someone's lips and seeing the words coming out their mouth.  I feel like I'm floating around in a bubble trying to control my arms and limbs and mouth to make them work like "actor Krissi" should but actually I'm only managing to act like a child who is not old enough to be able to follow instructions and wants to misbehave! 

At this point it is GAME OVER! There is very little useful work I can do. We still occasionally use this time to do bits and bobs but usually Zoë (the ultimate brain fog detector) calls it a day. 

It pretty much takes a night sleep to reset my brain so I have found myself going to bed at 9pm and then getting up earlier the next day to look at my script in preparation for the day ahead.

My poor brain. I think it's had a bit of a shock. It hasn't had to hold this much information in it for a very long time!

I am sure once all my lines are firmly cemented in my head it will get easier. It's just at the moment there is an awful lot to think about... Gulp! 

p.s I am having fish fingers with pasta and salad for my dinner incase you were wondering! 

 

Feelings on the first day!

So yesterday was our first day. 

It's been over a year since the producer Sophie first contacted myself and the director Zoë (Just realised I can do the little dots above the "e"if I write on my phone!!) about potentially doing the play again. 

Normally as an actor your agent just tells you when the audition is, what the dates/venues of the play are and how long it's for.  You get the job, you go and do it and then you finish. 

Obviously Sophie needed to know that me and Zoë were on board before she went ahead with the idea so we have been a part of it since day one. I can honestly say I had absolutely no idea how much work goes into putting on a show and planning a tour!

To have seen every step of this process has been an eye opener and given me a HUGE amount of respect for producers - I have to admit I didn't really know what they did before but now I do. They basically do everything! 

So yesterday was not just the start of rehearsals. it was the end of a years worth of planning. A years worth of hard work from Sophie and others.

After being so emotionally invested in the play and the journey up to that point, to finally all be there in the rehearsal space felt surreal. We had some hugs and hello's before settling down for the read through.

This is just a chance for everyone to hear the play out loud before rehearsals get started.  It's a bit strange doing a read through when you're the only actor but I just tried to focus on the script and forget about the other 6 people in the room!

After saying the final lines of the play, I dropped the script on the floor, said a few obligatory swear words and that was it, we'd begun!

Now I can't do many things, but after all that everyone else has done to get this amazing tour together, the very least I can do is make sure the audience get the best show I can give them once they are in their seats!

Actor Krissi is back in the building. Let's do it! 

Confession: I ate 7 mini pastries during rehearsals. They were good.

The day before it all begins!

Hello!

Welcome to my "Bogus Blog".  A place where I can hopefully share the experience of rehearsing and touring The Bogus Woman 2015! (click the link to go to the official website for more info on the play) 

I have no idea how this blog will turn out or what exactly it will be. I'm hoping it will be an interesting insight into what it is like being a part of a highly topical one woman play, however it might just turn into the ramblings of a terrified actress (although this could be fairly interesting too!)

So - it's the day before rehearsals begin, a time where any actor would normally feel at least a bit nervous. Travelling down to your digs, wondering what the director and the cast members will be like, wondering if you'll know anyone or have any links with peoples former cast mates, looking forward to the read through and seeing the set etc.  

This time for me it is different as I did the play back in 2008 as part of the Summer season at Theatre by The Lake, Keswick.  
I know the show, I know the cast (just me!), the director (Zoe Waterman), producer (Sophie Curtis of Curtis Productions), designer (Sophia Lovell a Smith), production manager/sound designer (Matt Hall), associate sound designer (Maura "fuzz" Guthrie), Lighting Designer (Jo Dawson)  AND I have even met the new stage manager (Kate Aisling Jones) because we had a little pre rehearsals date back in Manchester last week.  I actually know EVERYONE!  None of the first day awkwardness awaits me... Hoorah!

But I will still be nervous and I'll still be excited to get started as soon as we can.  

We only have 2 weeks rehearsal this time round. I can already hear you saying "Oh you've done this before you'll be fine".  Yes I have.  But 7 years is a very long time.  What were you doing in 2008? Could you do it again?!  I am sure the answer is the same as the one I am giving - I can do it again but actually I will still have to put in a lot of work!  

Also this time we are touring and of course every theatre space is different in both layout and size. In Keswick the show was performed in traverse, with audience members on both sides.  It worked so well like this I can't even begin to imagine how we will work it for larger, end on spaces but luckily I'm not a director so I will leave that in the capable hands of Zoe (I cant figure out how to put the two little dots above the "e" in her name - but they should be there!)

Anyway.  I should probably stop writing now as this is just supposed to be a quick hello from me for now.  

Keep watching for more posts and updates as we get underway. 

I'm scared but I am sure it will be fine.  It has to be.